I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired servants.’
- Luke 15:18-19

The younger son is going home to his father! What great news! What a beautiful scene!

But he doesn’t know what will happen when he gets home. Will he be shunned? Will he be scorned? Will he be assaulted?

The younger son considers the probable possibilities and comes up with a plan for how he can influence his reception when he arrives back at his father’s house.

The speech bubbles up and rumbles around in his mind. He carefully polishes every word.

“Father,” a strong assertion to anchor this conversation. “I have sinned,” look at how he owns it. “Against heaven and against you,” he gets how serious this is. “I am no longer worthy to be called your son,” he’s not looking for more inheritance money. “Make me like one of your hired servants,” playing on his father’s compassion. Surely the father won’t let his own son starve.

When we’ve broken relationships with other people or with God, we often want to maintain control over the terms of re-engagement. Our feelings of guilt and shame hurt us. We want to minimize the pain. “Surely,” we tell ourselves, “there must be a way for us to be back together that doesn’t hurt all that badly.”

What speeches are you rehearsing in your head today? Dig beneath them. What are you hoping to accomplish with your speech? Is there something else God has for you instead?